I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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