obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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