Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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