Me. At least after what I've been through.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
