She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
high people should be assigned attendants
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
