What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
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