toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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