all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
