left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
