Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
