do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize