Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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