my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
