the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
