Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I use my feet as sexual weapons
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
