I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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