so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
