I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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