the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
