i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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