I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
not ubering you a puppy
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
