i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
