I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
