Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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