Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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