she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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