The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
