Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
nutella sex= disaster
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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