the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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