Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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