I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
