I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Randomize
