Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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