just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
