I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
