dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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