so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
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Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
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please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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