i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
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I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
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Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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