I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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