Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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