like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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