Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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