his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
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