Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
