Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize