I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
