You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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