evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize
