Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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