Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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