i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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